May 12: Willing to go to any lengths to achieve sobriety

Back in 2017 my sponsor ~ she is also a Grow member ~ asked if l was willing to go to any lengths to achieve sobriety. It was such a relief to have found a place where l could be honest and admit that I am powerless over alcohol, drugs and others~and that my life is unmanageable when l try to control it. Of course l replied that l was willing! I remember thinking that alcohol was my problem and if l only would find a way to stop drinking all my problems would magically disappear. Little did l know, without drinking l still had a thinking problem :-)) And a big one l may add. “If you want what you’ve never had, you must do what you’ve never done.” Inspired and motivated by it all, my sobriety journey began. It took me years to grasp the concept of what it means to be fully willing to go to any lengths. For me it meant that I had to be willing to do some pretty hard things, like walk away from my family and my boyfriend. More so, l had to accept the things l cannot change, be courageous enough to change the things l can and know the difference. Every day I have to remind myself that I am not in control. Fear holds me back and stand in the way of surrendering fully.

Doing the right next thing sounds so easy but it takes courage, patience, discipline, determination and mercy. Mercy towards myself and others. Going to any lengths just for today means that I surrender to Gods ~ of my understanding ~ will. I had cultural and social beliefs that I have identified with, it’s not easy to let go of. It’s a day-to-day practice to surrender. All this and more like, taking accountability for my actions, making amends if necessary and serve to the best of my ability to me is showing up for my life and being willing to go to any lengths to achieve sobriety. I am grateful for the opportunity to chair this meeting and looking forward reading your thoughts and experiences on this topic.