Dealing With Ego
Ego is defined by Merriam-Webster as “the opinion that you have about yourself; a part of the mind that senses and adapts to the real world”.
This is the content for Layout P TagOn the other hand, Merriam-Webster’s definition of Humility is: “The quality or state of not thinking you are better than other people; the quality or state of being humble”.
When I drank, I felt I was smarter than and superior to everyone else and I let them know it! I could solve your problems and just about everyone else’s until the hangover hit the next morning at which time my attitude changed to ‘inferior’ and ego-shattering (my self-esteem) and feelings of guilt, shame and remorse set in – how could I have said or done those things the night before? What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I have stopped drinking after 2 or 3 beers? How could I have been so stupid as to have gotten drunk yet one more time when I promised myself the last time that I would never do this again?
I think that it takes an act of true humility to realize and acknowledge that we have a problem with alcohol (or anything else for that matter). If I practice humility, it allows me to be honest with myself, recognize that I don’t know it all, admit that I need help, and acknowledge that there is a God and our trusted AA family and friends who can help. I didn’t come to AA because of something great and wonderful that I did – rather, I was a sick and sorry individual without any hope of living a meaningful, purposeful, happy life with or without alcohol.
My program teaches me that a big part of being humble is to respect others and offer to help them, especially when they cannot help me in return. It also teaches me to admit that I’ve made mistakes, own up to them, and make amends, if necessary. Instead of comparing myself to others, I can take a measure of my own progress by comparing the person I am today to the person I used to be, because no one’s “outsides” will ever match my “insides”. Repeated inventories and Twelfth-Step work are routine reminders that I must work at preserving my sobriety and keeping my ego in check.
I would like to hear your views on the ego and how you manage to keep it in check. This is your meeting and I would like to hear from all of you; if not this topic, then please share on anything that is bothering you today.
Hugs and best wishes for a great day.
Laura G.
6/17/89