Oct 09: Detachment


Just another aspect that I rather struggled with when I first came into the program. I don’t know about you gals but I find the longer I am in the program that so many different things I struggled with now comes so much easier for me. When I read the BB so many times things pop out at me that I know I have read many different times and now makes sense to me. It’s like the light bulb goes on for me.

Detaching myself from old habits, drinking friends and old hangouts was difficult. Now I have to admit that as far as the friends went most of them just disappeared and that was hard for me, I finally had to accept the fact that they were not friends but just drinking buddies. The ones that did still come around I had to lovingly detach myself from them if they were drinking but most willing to spend time with them if they were not. Did not go to showers, get-togethers or parties where there was drinking but thanked them for inviting me.

I had to do the same thing with my ole hangouts but just went, for instance, up the street to the bar for lunch with my grandchildren and daughter. When I went there, there was no one there but the owners and I did not even do that until I was 4 yrs sober and never went often.

Detaching from old habits was a toughie. When you do something for so long it is truly hard to break the pattern. My way of doing it, I finally realized, was I was isolating. I would go too work, go too meetings, come home get on my puter and than go to bed. This summer was the first time I even spent any time at all in my backyard, see I use to sit at my picnic table and drink in my backyard so I had a really hard time sitting in the backyard because I would think about drinking, this was all in my head before I would even do it. See for me detaching was similar to “letting go and letting God” and you all know how we like to take our wills back now and than. When things happen today that I feel I have to detach from I can do it with love and kindness.

Last week I went to (6) f2f meetings and it was really awesome as that is what I did for my first 3 yrs sober. I went to all different meetings and it just felt so good. I want to thank you gals for allowing me to chair this meeting and for being here with me helping me to stay sober. What does detachment in the program mean to you or feel free to share on any topic you wish.