Hello, ladies, my name is Suanne and I am an alcoholic. Thank you for allowing me to be of service by chairing this meeting. We have had some great topics lately and I was a little nervous about chairing. I wanted to write something profound and “wow” you (old alcoholic thinking)! I’ve been sober for a few 24 hours and realize that even though alcohol has left my body, I’m still left with the alcoholic mind. 🙂
Yesterday, I had lunch with an old friend who is a normie. She asked me if she could talk to me about her son, who is drinking heavily and “doing what we do.” Her husband and her brother are also alcoholic. I listened and it brought it all back fresh as to how I hurt my family while I was drinking. She’s asking me what she could do and honestly, I could say only to pray for him. It’s so baffling to me even as an alcoholic how crazy our disease is and how crazy it makes us and I HAVE the disease. So think about how our family members are confused. The difference in cancer and alcoholism – both equally fatal diseases – is that alcoholism destroys families, careers, finances, health along the way. Cancer doesn’t do that. And a normie looks as us and says: why can’t you just stop?
I can’t tell you the number of times I swore to my son that I would not drink again – and meant it with every fiber of my being – yet by the time the hangover started wearing off, I was figuring out which liquor store to go to that day. It was a cycle born of addiction.
The good news I could tell her was that there is a solution — after alcohol takes you down (and the elevator only goes down if you are an alcoholic like me). But most alcoholics won’t stop until we do hit bottom. I told her I was grateful for my bottom because I remember it like it was yesterday and that anytime a drink starts looking good, I remember that bottom, play the tape all the way through, and it looks like poison again. I told her the solution gave me back my life and gave me a connection to God that I would not have had without it. Relationships have been restored, finances better, health better… but that all came after I hit bottom and started working the program.
I was happy I am in AA and could show her that recovery is possible. Every day is a living amends to my family. I now have a blended family of 4 kids and 7 grands with another on the way .. Only my son has seen me drunk but he has forgiven me (thank you God) and life is much better than I could ever have imagined, all thanks to God and the AA program and you.
So I’d ask you to think about your families. Where has your journey led you with amends and your families? I know some are struggling, some have restored families, some have new families. Can you share some hope for those who are still struggling? God works miracles and please don’t leave 5 minutes before your miracle happens.
I hope this wasn’t too long.