Procrastination
Hi, my name Rene and alcoholic.
When it came to step four I procrastinated big time, I was petrified of what will come out.
My sponsor still asked after two weeks whether I had quit the programme and or her. It was like a power struggle, I was thinking of good versus “evil”, , here me hanging by the “scales by my fingertips”.
Not that much coercion needed, simply a case of work the programme or not. Not a lot of choice, but better than where I was.
“Fear of failure is often the reason why people procrastinate”.
Before sobriety I could list many ways of why am putting something off. When my drinking developed into a “daily habit”, I cut myself off from everyone, just functioning going to work, then home to bottle ( I could not be an alcoholic as I was everyday at work). What a joke, I put myself in my self imposed hell hole.
I would debate with myself when having to do a project, and inevitably come up with some creative excuse as to why not done on time. The bottle kept my time.
Without this programme and group, which will remain grateful for, I let life take me according to my HP.