Survival
Surviving meant being born over and over.
———— Erica JongWe have decided to live. And each day we make the decision anew. Each time we call a friend, work a Step, or go to a meeting, we are renewing our contract with life. We are being reborn. Before coming to this program we died, emotionally and spiritually, many times. Some of us nearly died physically. But here we are, starting a new day, looking for guidance from one another. We are the survivors. And survival is there for the taking.
We will have days when we struggle with our decision to live. We will want to throw in the towel. We will want to give in or give up. But we’ve learned from one another about choices. And the choice to survive, knowing we never have to do it alone, gets easier with time.
I am one of the survivors. Today is my day for celebration.
Taken from ‘Each Day A New Beginning’ — Daily Meditations For Women
I chose this week’s topic after much thought and perusal. When I came across this meditation it struck me how true this topic is for each of us in this group as well as all the thousands of other groups and even those who are in situations where there is but themselves — each person a great example of an inner grace which has risen, even if quietly, to make a decision to want to overcome our common disease which desperately tries to destroy us. We come to these decisions in all possible ways and in all possible conditions.
I forget for the most part that I am a survivor because life has its daily tasks that require my attention. But I need to take a moment every now and then to look at myself and where I am today which is vastly different from many years, months, weeks and even days ago. Even as close as yesterday. I have made great changes, decisions, mistakes, growth, setbacks and successes. I need to take pride in the fact that I am daily surviving without the need for the alcohol which fought like crazy to keep me in its grip. Of course, not that kind of pride which will cause me to forget where I was and how hard I had to fight to get to where I am right now.
I thought it might be good for each of us to speak of her own survival. Do you look at yourself as a survivor and how do you feel about it? What did it take to get you here? And how do you feel about where you are now in your journey? I almost feel at times that we need a huge celebration because we have been so fortunate to have found the solution for our addiction. I realize that we only have a daily reprieve but nevertheless even a pat on the back for a job well done. But that job is ongoing. I will take each day as it comes and continue with your help to count myself as one of the survivors and do my best to carry the wonderful message so that some other suffering woman might find herself as one of us.