Have I Hit Bottom?
As a newcomer, my sponsor and I attended a 12&12 study where two old-timers would break down the 12 & 12 literature. I recall reading this paragraph with excitement! In active alcoholism, the Court ordered treatment with recommendations that included AA. At a meeting, I met an alcoholic who would buy beer from me two years prior, standing before me with 18 months sobriety. He pointed out that AA could never work for me unless I could answer yes to two questions: am I willing to go to any lengths for my sobriety; and am I entirely done drinking. The answer was no. He told me to go out and get done. So, when reading the 12 & 12 with my sponsor and 2 old-timers, this paragraph resonated with me:
“Why all this insistence that every A.A. must hit bottom first? The answer is that few people will sincerely try to practice the A.A. program unless they have hit bottom. For practicing A.A.’s remaining eleven Steps means the adoption of attitudes and actions that almost no alcoholic who is still drinking can dream of taking. Who wishes to be rigorously honest and tolerant? Who wants to confess his faults to another and make restitution for harm done? Who cares anything about a Higher Power, let alone meditation and prayer? Who wants to sacrifice time and energy in trying to carry A.A.’s message to the next sufferer? No, the average alcoholic, self-centered in the extreme, doesn’t care for this prospect– unless he has to do these things in order to stay alive himself. Under the lash of alcoholism, we are driven to A.A., and there we discover the fatal nature of our situation. Then, and only then, do we become as open-minded to conviction and as willing to listen as the dying can be. We stand ready to do anything which will lift the merciless obsession from us.” 12&12
None of this could work without hitting bottom.
Question: have you hit your bottom? Are you entirely done drinking and willing to go to any lengths for your sobriety? If so, what are you willing to do for your recovery?
“Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.” HOW, Chapter 5
Please share your experience, strength and hope. If you are unsure about hitting bottom, please share this with us too. Perhaps, our ESH would help the suffering alcoholic in this online room. God bless!
My name is Nicole and I am an alcoholic. Thank you for paying a 12 step call on me.