Fear and (Self) Loathing in Sobriety
Greetings all!! I come to you grateful and sober in Texas. This is my birthday week for 42 and for 5mos sobriety! Yay me! I am excited to host a meeting and nervous because I am responsible to give a great topic! I wish I had something prepared that I knew would be “just right” or that would inspire a revolution of sorts… however, I know that I’m barely a legitimate AA member and still so very green. I can only hope my humble participation will inspire others to speak up and share because well, hopefully you can’t do worse than me!! lol
I have learned my share of lingo and believe myself to have a fairly high bottom which is not bragging because I was only a drink away from the lowest bottom. I lack in the confidence to share or I guess of feeling important enough. Perhaps like many I have trust issues, I’m hard headed, I’m selfish, insecure, lazy, and a bit of a whiner. Perhaps these are those character defects that I need to ask my HP to remove?!! Maybe this is my topic!?!
All in all I have a very healthy fear of relapse and I’m not entirely sure what a dry drunk is but I know I don’t want that! So I lead today proud of 5 months sobriety and thirsty for encouragement. Thanks in advance to those that can find a topic in here somewhere and share with us newbies on fear and (self)loathing in sobriety. Perhaps I make sense to them!
Grace and Blessings, Brenda C DOS 2/21/17