July 10: How To Handle Sobriety

Topic for the week:

 “To Handle Sobriety” (Story on page 553) –

“But above all, it [AA] taught me how to handle sobriety” (p. 558)

”How do we do it? By learning—through practicing the Twelve Steps and through sharing at meetings—how to cope with the problems that we looked to booze to solve, back in our drinking days.  For example we are told in A.A. that we cannot afford resentments and self-pity, so we learn to avoid these festering mental attitudes.  Similarly, we rid ourselves of guild and remorse as we “clean out the garbage” from our minds through the Fourth and Fifth Steps of our recovery program.  We learn how to level out the emotional swings that got us into trouble both when we were up and when we were down.

We are taught to differentiate between our wants (which are never satisfied) and our needs (which are always provided for).  We cast off the burdens of the past and the anxieties of the future, as we begin to live in the present, one day at a time.  We are granted “the serenity to accept the things we cannot change”—and thus lose our quickness to anger and our sensitivity to criticism.

Above all, we reject fantasizing and accept reality.  The more I drank, the more I fantasized everything.  I imagined getting even for hurts and rejections.  In my mind’s eye I played and replayed scenes in which I was plucked magically from the bar where I stood nursing a drink and was instantly exalted to some position of power and prestige.  I lived in a dream world.  A.A. led me gently from fantasizing to embrace reality with open arms.  And I found it beautiful!  For at last, I was at peace with myself.  And with others.  And with God.” (p. 559).