Occasionally I decide I don’t need or want a meeting. Such dalliance doesn’t depend on length or even quality of sobriety. I do know that alcohol is always around the corner too. There is no graduation. This is not a new topic for sure. But a little nudge can’t hurt.
Meetings are both in-person and on-line but the constancy of meetings is what makes them feel like home wherever in the world they occur. I love that! The requirement, the message and the Promises are always the same. Easy peasy.
So what is in a meeting that sitting alone and reading the Big Book doesn’t offer me? (Like when I was drinking). It is a WE program which calls for the participation of all attendees. It is focused and keeps me in the moment. I am not in my head or ‘interpreting’ the Big Book or any other literature. I am able to reach out to someone at a meeting for support. Some meetings have a tag line ‘Don’t leave here without talking to someone if you are concerned about staying sober.’ I have an opportunity to do service which nurtures my own sobriety and that of others.
It is the human condition-and maybe more for this alcoholic-that it is easy to get stuck in negative thoughts that hamper good sense-sanity to be blunt. In isolation, in solitude my mind starts to spin around. I need validation that I am not unique, this too shall pass, and what others are doing to stay right sized. I don’t forget I am an alcoholic. Plus-where are my tools?! I surely tried all this ‘on my own’ once upon a time! And how did that work?
Long timers are often asked why they keep coming to meetings. To support their sobriety one day at a time. To share their ESH. To keep the memory green. Etc. Many say they can’t stay sober on their own. True dat.
GROW is hard to alibi out of since it is ever-present. My state of mind and distraction are reasons to skip. I can always conjure up an alibi why I should not go to a meeting. Gladly I am not able to talk my way out of sobriety because it is what I want and treasure so much. But I need you to remind me…more than I realize. See you at a meeting. Let’s keep the home fires burning!