From the daily reflection on 10/14/26:
A Program for Living:
” We ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self pity, dishonest or self seeking motives”
Dishonesty? For quite some time during my daily inventory I asked myself have I been dishonest today? Have I told a lie today? Replying no, not that I recall and giving myself a check for honesty.
However, in reflection am I really being honest?
In recovery and in AA I assumed honestly would just magically happen in sobriety, doesn’t being sober attract honesty? I hang around with others who claim they are honest; can honesty just rub off on you?
However, we alcoholics are dishonest in many ways, in the past we say we drank 3 drinks but had 8, we were dishonest about what we had for lunch, when our partner was unpleasant, they were nasty. Alcoholics rationalize, minimize, exaggerate, and slide around the idea of rigorous honesty. At times I must admit this came naturally.
We lie in our thoughts, in our words, in our commitments and we lie to ourselves. We conceal and deny. It feels at times we can’t do otherwise. Dishonesty is part of our disease and to stay sober requires rigorous honesty in both fact and detail.
I must admit I am guilty almost daily of dishonesty. My current glaring example I would like to share with you. Today I find myself drawn to my favorite response when greeted anywhere including an AA meeting. Hi how are you today? My instant reply is Oh I’m fine, how are you? This is a lie at times, I’m not fine. My life can be a mess at times; I’m going through hard times. I’m an alcoholic in recovery. Why can’t I just say the truth today I’m not ok, or I’m no sure how I am.
AA and these rooms are place where being fine is not a requirement, saying I’m struggling, or life is rough right now is welcome.
If my honesty can prevent a relapse, it’s well worth it.
Today is my daily inventory I am trying to explore all forms of honesty. It has been eye opening.
Where are you with your daily inventory, your honesty?
Please feel free to share or on any subject that helps you with your sobriety.
Grateful Recovering Online Women