The topic for this week is the 10th Step: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
“A continuous look at our assets and liabilities, and a real desire to learn and grow by this means, are necessities for us. … For the wise have always known that no one can make much of his life until self-searching becomes a regular habit, until he is able to admit and accept what he finds, and until he patiently and persistently tries to correct what is wrong.” (p.88 12&12)
When I got to this phase in my recovery, I was quite skeptical and weary about the benefits of this step until I started doing it on a regular basis. As I progressed I saw that I was improving my life on a daily basis. Accepting my defects of character and find ways not to act that way again, living my amends to my fellow wo/man.
What really sealed this step for me was the promises:
“If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us – sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.” (p.83-4 12&12)
It helped me realize sanity had returned and I was living on a much better basis. I wasn’t tempted by alcohol anymore, serenity had entered my life, I wasn’t fighting anyone or anything, there was peace. I wasn’t wrapped up in myself, I was thinking of others and trying to help them. I was more able to live life on life’s terms and could handle situations that used to baffle me.
None of this happened overnight, it is a process that progresses over time and I am eternally grateful